“Love is the way and the path, our prophet.
Of love we are born, love is our mother.
Our mother, love, is hiding in our veil,
Hiding from our unbelieving nature.”
– Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī
The more time passes the more debate rises over the content of one's life. This is due in large part to the availability and reliability of primary sources—or lack thereof—as time passes. There is more time for nuances discussion. Further still is the claim to a legacy. The more influential a person was, the more people want to claim them. This is very much the case with thirteenth-century poet and Islamic scholar Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī.
Born September 1207 in Persia, one of the defining factors in his life was his travels. Though he was born in what is now Afghanistan and is even credited as a prominent Afghan poet, he was forced to leave his home very young. The Mongol Invasion forced his family and their disciples west. It was during their migration that they came across famed poet Attar, who became a mentor to Rūmī, going so far as to give him his Asrārnāma, a text discussing the relationship between the soul and the material world.
The family found their way to Baghdad and met up with local scholars. They continued from Hejaz to Mecca to Damascus to Malatya to Erzincan to Sivas to Kayseri to Nigde, finally settling in Konya, Turkey. It was there in 1244 that Rūmī once again met Shams Tabrizi. Though they had met when Rūmī was eighteen, their relationship did not begin in earnest until Rūmī was in his late thirties.
Where Rūmī came from a well-respected family and inherited his father's position as a spiritual leader, Tabrizi was a homeless basket weaver and not particularly well-liked. He was quick to anger and known to swear in front of children. It was his temperament that led to their meeting. Tabrizi prayed to Allah to find a friend able to "endure" him and was drawn to Rūmī's home.
Regardless of their differences, the two grew fond of each other, moving in together and becoming practically inseparable. Both men were spiritually sought after for their wisdom and were educated in many different arenas, encouraging and engaging one another on equal footing in that standard.
It was Tabrizi who attempted to draw Rūmī’s interest to poetry and dance, describing them as spiritual pursuits as well as artistic ones. The two were seen as kindred spirits and were deeply in love. There are accounts of them spending hours staring into each other's eyes, apparently having discussions that transcended the need for speech.
Since evidence of a sexual relationship between two people is rare to find in the first place, it is nearly impossible to discover centuries after both have died. Translator Coleman Barks described their relationship, saying:
“They spent months together without any human needs, transported into a region of pure conversation."
Whether or not there was ever a sexual aspect to their relationship is debatable; what is certain is their deep love for one another.
It was due in part to their unwavering closeness that Tabrizi was forced to leave for the first time. After months of living together and Rūmī giving Tabrizi almost all of his attention, discontent grew. Not only were there large class and social differences between the two, but as one of the most respected men in the region, Rūmī’s attention was a coveted thing. Pressure began to build, and eventually, Tabrizi was driven out of Konya and went to Syria.
Heartbroken, Rūmī fell ill, and his distress was noted by those around him. His sons eventually sought out Tabrizi and brought him home. When the two men saw each other again, they were said to have both fallen on their knees, embracing. In a time where most relationships were expected to have an underlying power dynamic, equal devotion was noted, with one account saying:
“No one knew who was lover and who the beloved.”
Together again, the men lived happily for some time. Again Rūmī’s disciples began to become envious, believing that they were owed more of Rūmī’s attention. What happened next is heavily debated, but it is generally agreed that whilst the men were talking in the middle of the night, there was a knock at the door. While some argue that Tabrizi returned to his life as a wanderer, others say Rūmī’s sons or disciples killed him. All that we know for certain is that he disappeared, and Rūmī never saw his love again.
The loss of his love, no matter the cause, changed Rūmī. It was at this time that he finally began to pursue poetry and dance, as Tabrizi had encouraged. Much of the work he did here was dedicated to Tabrizi's memory. It was during Rūmī's search for Tabrizi in Damascus that he wrote the following:
“Why should I seek? I am the same as
He. His essence speaks through me.
I have been looking for myself!”
Believing that the two had become one, Rūmī began to cope with the loss. He wrote of a transcendent love overwhelming any barriers. He valued love and compassion above all else, writing about the connection between love and spirituality, saying:
“When mankind gathers on that final day
And faces pale from fear of reckoning,
I'll hold your love in the palm of my hand,
And I will say, 'By this I'm saved or damned.'”
Many of his poems seem to be inspired by their relationship or written about Tabrizi himself, including the Diwan-e Shams-e Tabrizi, which is now regarded as a masterpiece. It contains 44,282 lines, 3,229 ghazals, 44 tarji-bands, and 1,983 quatrains. While written primarily in Persian, some are in Arabic, Greek, and Turkish, reflecting his traveled past. The book was named in memory of Tabrizi.
He also became deeply involved in dance, seeing within it a beauty reminiscent of poetry and a path to God. He wrote and danced and created and traveled for the rest of his life. He met more men with whom he found inspiration and understanding of God.
As a widely respected Muslim scholar, he made a point to embrace and respect other religions, writing:
“On the seeker’s path, wise men and fools are one.
In His love, brothers and strangers are one.
Go on! Drink the wine of the Beloved!
In that faith, Muslims and pagans are one.”
His teachings are still highly regarded by those of many faiths. Professor Majid M. Naini wrote:
"Rumi's life and transformation provide true testimony and proof that people of all religions and backgrounds can live together in peace and harmony. Rumi’s visions, words, and life teach us how to reach inner peace and happiness so we can finally stop the continual stream of hostility and hatred and achieve true global peace and harmony.”
Though he died in 1273, his work remains incredibly relevant and respected, translated into many languages, including English, Russian, German, Urdu, Turkish, Arabic, Bengali, and Spanish. His work has been interpreted in songs, plays, concerts, and dances all around the world.
There is still heavy debate about who is entitled to his legacy, and it will likely continue to be debated for a long while. Because borders did not exist in the same way in the 13th century as they do now, Turkey, Afghanistan, and Iran all believe Rūmī to be an iconic poet representative of their country.
In terms of sexuality, as was said of borders, modern labels did not exist in the 13th century. With that in mind, the reality of finding a home in Syria, Turkey, Afghanistan, and Iran deserves exploration and respect, just as the realities of loving both men and women throughout his life.
While he had no connection to or chance to self-identify with the labels and borders that exist today, it would still be more than fair for a queer person to connect with him based on his queerness, just as it is fair for any Turk, Syrian, Iranian, or Afghan to identify with him based on where he made his home and his impact on their cultures.
His work, just like his love, was transcendent and can be understood in a multitude of interesting and valuable ways. Being respected by Muslims, Jews, and Christians alike, one does not need to identify or even fully understand every aspect of him to learn from his work.
So where better to end than with his words:
“We are drunk on the essence without even tasting the wine,
Filled with light in the morning, and joyful into the night.
They say our path leads nowhere—that's alright:
There's joy enough right here to fill all time.”
[Disclaimer: some of the sources may contain triggering material]
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Cherry, K. (2018). Rumi: Poet and Sufi mystic inspired by same-sex love. Retrieved from https://qspirit.net/rumi-same-sex-love/
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